Who's at Your Table Matters, Too
I recently gave a talk on finding gratitude in festive celebrations.
During the conversation, we each paused to set a vision for the months ahead. How do you want to feel this holiday season? How do you want to show up for yourself and others? What energy do you want to bring to events, celebrations, and daily activities? Who do you want to surround yourself with? What would make the holidays meaningful to you?
Then we talked honestly about what gets in the way. The expectation, our own and other people's, that celebrations should be perfect. Traditions we carry on out of habit, even when they no longer fit the generations gathering around the table. And the quiet stress of holding all of it.
So I asked a question: when you really pause, what matters most? Is it the fine china and the polished silverware? Or the conversation and connection that happen around the table?
If paper plates and plastic forks are what let you relax, enjoy yourself, and actually be with the people you love this year, that's okay. More than okay.
It turns out the research has something to say about this, too.
What the new research found
A study published in Science Advances in September tested something simple. Researchers at Hebrew University and Sheba Medical Center gave adults the same carbohydrate meal, a portion of white bread, twice: once with a close companion and once alone. Then they tracked blood sugar for two hours.
When people ate together, their blood sugar rose less after the meal and came back to baseline faster. Same food. Different company.
The lead researcher put it this way: "Blood sugar regulation is not just about what we eat, but who we eat with."
A few honest notes. This was a small lab study, set in a room made to feel like a living room. The effect varied a lot from person to person. And it wasn't tested in people with diabetes or prediabetes, so eating with a friend is not a substitute for your care plan. But it adds to something many of us have felt for a long time: connection does something real for our bodies.
Sharing meals and well-being around the world
A second study, published this spring in Scientific Reports, looked at the bigger picture. Using Gallup data from 142 countries, researchers found that people who share more meals with others report greater well-being in almost every region of the world. How often people shared meals explained about as much of the difference in well-being as income or unemployment.
They also found that Americans are eating alone more often each year, especially younger generations. And on days when people ate at least one meal with someone else, they reported more happiness and less stress.
Notice what neither study measured: the menu, the centerpiece, or whether the napkins matched.
Nourishment is more than nutrition
As a dietitian, I care about what's on the plate. I always will. But I've come to believe that how we eat, and who we eat with, is part of nourishment too. Conversation slows us down. We notice our food. We laugh. We linger.
You see this when you travel. In so many places, a meal is still an event. People sit down together, take their time, and the table is where the day comes together. To me, that's part of living well through the world: bringing a little of that home.
Small ways to protect the connection this season
As the holidays get closer, a few small edits can keep the focus where it belongs:
Pause and picture the feeling. Before you plan the menu, ask how you want to feel when everyone leaves. Let that guide what you keep and what you let go.
Choose the traditions that still fit. Keep the ones that bring people together. It's okay to retire or reshape the ones that only bring stress.
Make it easier on purpose. Paper plates, a potluck, store-bought pie. Whatever frees you to sit down and stay at the table.
Put the phones away. Being together at the table means being present at the table.
Invite one more person. A neighbor, a friend far from family, someone who might otherwise eat alone.
Your turn this week
Take two minutes to pause and ask yourself: how do I want to feel around the table this season?
Then share one meal this week with someone, simply, and notice how you feel during it and after it.
That noticing is where change starts.
Come along
If you'd like more small, research-backed ways to live well through the world, join my email list.
You can also download my free PAVE Method worksheet, a simple way to pause, get clear on what matters, and make changes that last.
And if you'd love to share long tables with new friends, take a look at our trip to Slovenia, June 10–20, 2027. Early-bird pricing ends October 31.
Sources
De Neve, J.-E., Dugan, A., Kaats, M., & Prati, A. (2026). Sharing meals is associated with greater wellbeing. Scientific Reports, 16, 18741. doi.org/10.1038/s41598-026-46771-9
Masalha, M., Fuchs, S., Atzil, S., et al. (2026). Social physiology: Human homeostasis is more efficient in social proximity. Science Advances. doi.org/10.1126/sciadv.aeg4937